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Episode Overview:
Gardner shares profound insights on the significance of uncovering core values, personal missions, and intrinsic motivations, emphasizing their pivotal role in guiding individuals toward greater fulfillment and purpose. The conversation navigates through practical strategies, reflective exercises, and anecdotes, providing a roadmap for individuals seeking to align their actions with their intrinsic purpose, enabling them to make meaningful contributions in their personal lives and professional endeavors.
Additional Resources:
Skot Waldron (00:01.57)
Hello Courtney.
Courtney Gardner (00:03.905)
Hello, Scott.
Skot Waldron (00:05.99)
I am so excited to talk to you. And we were talking about something a long time ago and I said, oh my gosh, do you want to be on my show? And you're like, I guess. And I said, very cool. And now we're on the show and now we're talking and we're gonna just explore some cool stuff because you keep saying cool things and I forgot to record them. So you're gonna have to say more cool things.
Courtney Gardner (00:16.893)
I'm sorry.
Courtney Gardner (00:25.737)
Well, I'm a cool lady, so...
Skot Waldron (00:28.598)
That is true. That is very true. I hope everybody can feel the coolness through the audio. And if you can see her, then you'll know how cool she looks at least. So there you go.
Courtney Gardner (00:33.749)
Yeah.
Courtney Gardner (00:37.605)
is a total nerd that lives inside of this exterior and personality.
Skot Waldron (00:44.854)
That's cool. Cool. We're all nerdy in a little, in some ways here. It's cool to be a nerd now. So it's all good.
Courtney Gardner (00:49.845)
I like it. I think weird is a positive attribute. So why would you want to be normal?
Skot Waldron (00:53.719)
There you go.
Courtney Gardner (00:58.158)
I don't either.
Skot Waldron (00:58.494)
Normal means your average, right? Maybe. I don't know. We could explore that sometime.
Courtney Gardner (01:01.809)
or less than, I don't know. It could be regular versus normal. Maybe there's a difference in nuance there, but yeah.
Skot Waldron (01:09.314)
Maybe, maybe, maybe. Uh, if anybody has any answers to that, please let us know. Uh, in the meantime, I want, I, yeah, call my call the line, the landline. Go ahead and, um, give us some scoop on you. I want to hear like, how did you land where you are right now? Cause you're killing it. And I want to know what you're doing and how you got here.
Courtney Gardner (01:13.973)
Please call us.
Courtney Gardner (01:18.523)
the landline.
Courtney Gardner (01:33.165)
Interesting, interesting actually. And somehow I don't really know how I got here, but I kind of know how I got here. So I have a resume that on paper makes no sense to hire me for my role in Keller Williams. I work for the Southeast region. We do the luxury division down here. But on paper, you really wouldn't hire me for this job, except it's the perfect set of skills that brought me there. So I worked at in high finance for a while.
I got bored with that and I went and worked in new home construction and I was like, I don't like that. Then I did interior design. Then I had a baby and then I went and worked in film and television and then I was just seeking something new. And a friend of mine said, Hey, they need your help with this marketing. And so I went and worked for a real estate team. And then two years after that, I got a call from the owner of the Southeast region, co-owner, she has a partner. And she said, I'm hiring you for this job. And I said, why?
I, why I've only done like two little things. And so now I'm in this path where I help thousands of agents, um, with their luxury business, and I talked to a lot of cool people and get to do a lot of cool stuff, but it started with, um, when I turned 40, I took a look at my life and said, Oh, this is a benchmark year. And you, your entire life, you've been fighting for, clawing for, and making things happen in your life. And.
You still don't have this piece that you would want to have after you've reached some level of success. Why is that? Maybe it's because you're saying no to things because you think it needs to be on this certain path to meet the plan for you to get to the goal and maybe you just start saying yes to things. And so I started saying, yeah, I'll do that. And two years later, I ended up here.
Isn't that strange? So I got here because I said yes.
Skot Waldron (03:34.062)
That is, but look at all the stuff you did to get here. Like, tell me, so, you know, incidental meetings, incidental things are not incidentals, what one of my other guests said. There's some reason you went on this like crazy connect the dots path, and then all of a sudden you're landing here. And.
Courtney Gardner (03:39.317)
Yeah.
Skot Waldron (04:03.198)
All those things that you gathered from those past jobs, those past experiences, you know, incorporate themselves into doing what you're doing now. Would you say? Yeah.
Courtney Gardner (04:13.385)
Yeah, 100%. I use all of it almost every single day. And if I didn't have it, I would constantly be trying to learn and fill a void. But because I just, I'm a person who follows their foot naturally. Like, oh, that's the next thing I need to pursue. And, but I've always forced it. I've always been like, I'm going to find this thing and do that thing and get this done. And then when I turned 40, I just said, I feel like I've worked hard enough.
Maybe there's some doors that I'm missing because it's not in my sort of blinder vision of things that need to be done. And, um, now I have no real power, but I sit next to power. So it's very interesting. And opportunities just started opening up. Would you like to do this? I think you would be great for that. Can you help me with this? Yeah. And so I've just get to meet really cool people and help them make their lives better.
from a day-to-day basis. And I still have grumpy days. There's a salty lady who lives in here. Oh yeah. Fiery. There's a fire that lives inside of this body. And then an angel who goes, maybe don't say that. Okay. Gotcha.
Skot Waldron (05:15.054)
What? You do?
Skot Waldron (05:29.646)
Okay. Do you listen to that angel?
Courtney Gardner (05:33.209)
Like 37% of the time we're working on her bedding average, but yeah. Yeah.
Skot Waldron (05:35.01)
That's pretty good.
That's pretty good. That's better than some of the people I coach. So well done. That's awesome.
Courtney Gardner (05:44.235)
Well, I also look like a kindergarten teacher, so people naturally assume I'm nice, but I'm not always nice.
Skot Waldron (05:52.77)
those kindergartner teachers. But I was just like, you know, you think, like when you have the parent, the parent days, you come in there, you're like, oh, she sounds really sweet. And then like by day seven, your child's crying when they come home from school.
Courtney Gardner (06:06.671)
Yeah, well, it's usually because you told the kid no, but whatever. Yeah, no white group in rough neighborhoods. So there's some, I'm not taking that from you and me, but most of the time I'm pretty chill.
Skot Waldron (06:11.143)
Yeah.
Skot Waldron (06:21.454)
So what instilled that in you? What this instilled this? So you've jumped from thing to thing. You're kind of like, oh, I'm not ready for that. I'm gonna get, I'm bored with that. I'm gonna go to this, I'm bored with that. I'm gonna go to this. And you're kind of like, it seems like you were looking for something or you were just always trying to achieve something or you're just trying, you're working towards something and there's this fire in you, you said. And I don't wanna settle, I wanna be.
Courtney Gardner (06:32.383)
Yeah.
Courtney Gardner (06:46.965)
and fire.
Skot Waldron (06:49.314)
that I want to be better or what like what is that thing that was driving you that was just like and then where did it come from?
Courtney Gardner (06:58.945)
Um, it definitely comes from my childhood. I always knew I wanted different than what was around me. Um, I don't know really what triggered that. I feel like I vaguely remember being at this barbecue. My mom, um, married a new man and he was in the army and, um, he had a high rank. He earned his way up whole Vietnam story. That's a whole other podcast.
Courtney Gardner (07:27.097)
we would be in these rooms that we didn't belong in. And I saw people who had different lives. Because when you're a kid and say you grew up poor, you grew up rich, you grew up middle-class, doesn't matter, you kind of have this skewed view of the world that everyone else is like you because you're like people are around like people. You can afford to live in the same neighborhood. So your world is those people. And so I didn't know better until a certain age that there was a different path.
And I think I saw it and said, Oh, that's mine at a very young age. Always been different in that way. Um, and I just thought it out and made it happen. I worked three jobs in college. Like I just made it happen. I chose very different partnerships for a long time. I pretended I was somebody that wasn't at the root of who I was. Like I denied that I grew up without, you know, a lot of food or never had any brand shoes.
And now I feel like that's the thing that qualifies me to be where I am. Cause who's better to help somebody come out of that than somebody who's been through it. So, yeah, I think that's what did it.
Skot Waldron (08:39.146)
And that, so that desire to not only provide something better for your kids and, and whatever, I'm sure as, as part of that, um, but you lived it and you set a vision for yourself early on in life said that was, that's for me. Like that's where I want to go. And you were set on doing it. Now what's kept you on the path though, because there's a lot of people, I'm going to say there's a lot of people that will go out there and go, yeah, I want that, but then they.
Courtney Gardner (08:49.63)
Yeah.
Courtney Gardner (08:56.608)
Yeah.
Skot Waldron (09:08.578)
That's too hard or, oh, that's, I don't know. Oh, that knocked me down or, oh, I just never get the chance because of this. Or, Oh, I've got too many other things. Like what, what keeps you going?
Courtney Gardner (09:11.41)
It is hard.
Courtney Gardner (09:19.551)
Yeah.
Courtney Gardner (09:23.697)
I'm very competitive and I'm very internally competitive. Like I want you to be the best that you in your lane. I'm not competitive to you. I'm competitive to myself. So I always wanna be better than the day I was than the day before, always. And so the drive for that, and just to be honest, opening up a pantry and having it full of food is a great feeling.
And, you know, my kids coming into a pantry full of food and going, there's nothing to eat is very pleasing to me. Cause I'm like, Oh, there's nothing to eat all the time. Like all the time. Um, and so that's, it's very soothing to me in a way because they don't know. And I'm proud that they don't know. And so I think it shifts as you age and as spaces in your life change. So like the first phase out of college is probably like just being able to pay your rent without worrying about.
Skot Waldron (09:56.046)
Did your kids say that too? Oh gosh, okay.
Courtney Gardner (10:18.013)
you know, whether or not you can buy milk that week was a big phase and okay, accomplish that. And then moving up in a, in a position, okay, accomplish that has always been internally driven for me. And then my husband is very supportive. He lets me be a little nutty. And he's like, that's you, babe. And I love you. Or he'll tell me, you're, you're DTM and you're doing too much.
So he kind of protects me from burning myself into the ground because I burned myself into the ground quite a few times because you just can't do it all without help. So, yeah.
Skot Waldron (10:51.514)
I love your perspective shift on the, let's just take the pantry thing, okay? And my kids go to the pantry and let's go, there's nothing here to eat. And I'm going, I don't know, do my eyeballs, do they work the same as yours? Because I see a whole bunch of stuff in here that you could eat. And my whole thing is like, oh, they're just, they don't appreciate it.
Courtney Gardner (10:57.438)
Yeah.
Courtney Gardner (11:11.774)
Yeah.
Skot Waldron (11:18.334)
And I sit there and I also say, hey, let's shift your mindset to a little bit not working for you. Let's shift the language to, there's nothing in here I want to eat. Like, let's just shift it a bit. I get that, okay? If you don't wanna eat zucchini noodles, fine, you know? But like, let's be a little bit more precise in what you're saying. But you're just like, you almost hear that and go, you almost smile. Like after they say that, you're almost like,
Courtney Gardner (11:19.208)
Mm-hmm.
Courtney Gardner (11:29.647)
Yes.
Courtney Gardner (11:33.234)
Yeah.
Courtney Gardner (11:45.853)
Yeah.
Skot Waldron (11:47.51)
That's right. You know, you, you're right. You, you, you look in there and you deny the fact that thing's full, you know, like that sense of pride is just something really interesting that I think a lot of people don't experience.
Courtney Gardner (11:49.281)
That's right, there's no food in there.
Courtney Gardner (12:04.489)
They don't, they don't. And I think you have to bend through that kind of lifestyle to do it. Now, as a kid, I don't think I really fully understood it. And so I started engaging in other places in the world that it was different. So, which is the great thing about being a kid is that the world is happy for you, even when it's not. A few exceptions to that. We know what they are, they're terrible and they're on the news, but.
You know, you just don't really realize that until you start getting out into the world, which is my experience, I think is so important for people. Be in different rooms, seek different locations. Don't go to the same places because you're going to see a different thing that might be your thing. Oh, I want that. But if you don't get out of your little bubble, you'll never see it and you'll never pursue it. And I think that's where a lot of people who don't leave that kind of life or don't choose a different life is because they never saw it. Not because they don't want it. They just never saw it.
Skot Waldron (12:59.726)
Okay, step out of the bubble, because you may miss something.
Courtney Gardner (13:06.557)
Yeah. And if you're in a position to do so, give to a charity that helps kids get out of the bubble. Send them to camp, you know?
Skot Waldron (13:07.438)
That's cool.
Skot Waldron (13:14.638)
There you go. Cause sometimes people are stuck in the bubble and if not their choice to necessarily be stuck in the bubble.
Courtney Gardner (13:19.326)
Yeah.
You don't know what you don't know. Sometimes they don't know.
Skot Waldron (13:24.558)
There you go. Okay. So how does this lead to this big Y? Like talk about the big Y. What is that to you?
Courtney Gardner (13:32.501)
So the big, the big why is that Keller Williams sort of hallmark. And it's really narrowing down the process of why you do what you do. And it's almost never money, although money can be a part of it. It's usually something that drives your soul. And for some people that's, you know, you want to be able to take care of your parents, the way they took care of you for other people, it's like, you want to be able to.
explore the world. It could be any number of things. For me, it's that the cycle of poverty ends at my bloodline. From here going forward, they have an opportunity to be anything they want without the limited struggles of survival in some aspects. And I want to be able to repay the people who helped me along the way. Because even though I feel like I forced a lot of things, I wasn't alone. I had cheerleaders, you know, I had people who...
maybe sacrificed something that I don't know about yet and stay in my life and stay in contact that maybe they didn't have a better life. And so that's really what drives me is shifting that perspective and making sure that people know that you can call me if you need anything. I may not be able to give you the exact help that you need, but I'll be there for you. Or maybe I can fill that need. I never felt like I had a safety net or someone who I could call when I was in trouble. So I try to be that for other people.
Skot Waldron (15:00.686)
So I believe in the same type of process. I think that there's, you know, your purpose may shift at certain times in life a bit, depending on what you're doing. Your purpose, people will say, my purpose is my family. And I'm like, well, not really. Like that's not, I mean, and money, make more money is not really your purpose. There's something bigger than that.
Courtney Gardner (15:21.425)
Is it? Yeah.
Courtney Gardner (15:28.669)
I mean, money is nice though.
Skot Waldron (15:30.794)
Oh, money is nice. It will enable certain things to happen, but there's lots of people that have nothing that money-wise and are perfectly content and happy in their purpose, in their life, and what they're doing. So there's...
Courtney Gardner (15:35.039)
Yeah.
Courtney Gardner (15:46.237)
And sometimes very wealthy people are the most miserable people you'll ever meet.
Skot Waldron (15:50.742)
There. And, um, so I think that there's a, a balance there. And so when I, when I go through this person process, you know, mine is to enable the dreamers of the world to be who they were designed to be. I believe that we were all put on the planet to be in. Do something. And some people don't feel that permission to be that they feel like they have to be something else or whatever. Um, but I.
Courtney Gardner (16:16.17)
Yeah.
Skot Waldron (16:16.446)
I want to enable them. I want to equip them. I want to tool them. I want to empower them and educate them to be that thing. And so that fuels me. And that is why I do what I do. Now, whether I'm doing that through coaching people like I am now or public speaking, or whether I'm doing that by owning a snow cone machine, you know.
Courtney Gardner (16:39.883)
Balloon animals, that's a solid choice. Yeah.
Skot Waldron (16:43.944)
I tried to go into that one time and my fingers got really tired. So I was.
Courtney Gardner (16:49.673)
way to type a for things that, um, like allow for flaws. Like I love scrapbooks. I can't do it. I will get lost into like, there's no symmetry here. Let's let somebody else do that.
Skot Waldron (17:03.214)
Is there any symmetry in scrapbooking or is the point of it not to have symmetry at all?
Courtney Gardner (17:06.193)
No, that's the point and I can't do it. I can't do it. I also can't arrange like chachkis, like this kind of stuff. My friend comes over because I will just get lost in it. I can't do that. I'm like, I'm a big picture person. So sometimes those tiny little details will just tsunami me and we're not, we're not getting out of that one.
Skot Waldron (17:32.258)
Okay, well then going into how you execute your why, that's something that's very important to think about. And that self-discovery of, hey, this thing kind of lowers what we call your peace index. It lowers that idea of my happiness factor when I get bogged down into doing the nitty gritty stuff. Not what I wanna be doing. Now when I can sit on the mountain top and strategize, I'm in my happy place. And...
Courtney Gardner (17:40.19)
Yeah.
Courtney Gardner (17:54.272)
Yeah.
Courtney Gardner (17:59.505)
Yeah, I've always wanted minions. This is like where I think when I feel like I've made it is if I have like, not minions, that's probably not a kind way to say that, but you know, an army of people. I would love that because then only I would understand them and no one else could ask them to do something. I mean, that would probably work for me, but you know, just an army of people that can execute on all the things because my brain goes 100 miles an hour.
Skot Waldron (18:13.302)
I was like the real like the cartoon ones like.
Skot Waldron (18:20.36)
Yeah, okay. All right. All right.
Courtney Gardner (18:28.381)
in terms of ideas. And so focusing that on the thing that actually needs to be done, um, is a challenge, but I still want those other things done. So it always eats up a little bit of my mental load. Yeah. That's when I've made it. I have an army behind me.
Skot Waldron (18:41.178)
There you go. DTM, DTM Courtney. Um, don't do too much because here's the thing when you do too much, you just don't do any of it well. And that's why we need to learn to do that stuff. It's like, how do I delegate? Well, and then people are like, well, I don't know. I can't delegate well, cause I don't have anybody and I can't afford to hire anybody to delegate anything too. So I have to do everything myself. I've been there launching my small business and
Courtney Gardner (18:43.797)
DTM in.
Courtney Gardner (18:52.573)
Mm-hmm.
Courtney Gardner (19:06.645)
Yeah.
Skot Waldron (19:08.214)
when it was just me and you know, it's, I get it. I totally get it. How have you battled that thinking?
Courtney Gardner (19:14.591)
Yeah.
Courtney Gardner (19:19.941)
Oh, it's a daily battle. I will tell you still. Um, but I will tell you that I've sort of grown into this person. And one of my very good friends says that my superpower is this for you. No, is a complete sentence. So you can say no to things. And I know that, um, I feel a lot of pressure to say yes to a lot of stuff. Like I can do a lot of things, but should I be doing those things? People will ask me.
Can you, can you, can you, can you, can you, can you? And I could just go, no. And that's sort of how I balanced that.
Skot Waldron (19:52.103)
Okay.
So how do you balance the, I need to say yes to certain opportunities to understand, cause I, I've heard this for a number of years and I want to, I want to pick this bone with you because I think it's interesting discussion. I mean, we just talk about, I don't think we're going to solve the world's problems, but it's I've heard this forever. Did yes today it's done. What, what.
Courtney Gardner (20:12.678)
No, we're going to do that today.
Today it's done.
Skot Waldron (20:19.062)
Cause did you ever hear that? Uh, I think there was a Ted talk or something. There's always a Ted talk. I'm just going to say it was a Ted talk of some of the, just said yes to everything for like a year. And it was, do you remember that? And it was just like all these doors open it, open up this new philosophy of, Hey, everybody needs you to start saying yes to everything. Cause you never know what's going to happen on the other side of that. Yes. And if you say no, the door remains closed and.
Courtney Gardner (20:26.282)
Yeah.
Courtney Gardner (20:29.942)
Yes, I've seen that one. Yeah.
Courtney Gardner (20:44.864)
Yes.
Mm-hmm.
Skot Waldron (20:49.386)
I've had kind of an issue with that, especially as a coach that's coaching executives and people that are completely underwater and like take on too much and that say yes to everything because they want others. I don't know. There's multiple reasons, but they want others to feel like they're invested in them or they don't want to let anybody down or they want to look competent or whatever. So they say yes to everything and then it doesn't do anybody any good. So what are your thoughts on that?
Courtney Gardner (21:20.545)
think that you have to shift the perspective of what yes means, because there's a tenet in improv that it always goes, yes and, right? So if someone comes to you and says, could you help me with this? That doesn't necessarily mean you have to be the doer of that. Your yes could be, yes, and I know the perfect person for you to talk to. So you can shift that sort of process to still, you know, serving your people pleasing thing if you have that in you.
I don't have a people pleasing gene. My son does, but I don't. I'm just like, I don't care what you think of me. He does. So your process of yes, and here's how you do it, is not the same as saying yes and you doing it. And I think if you, but most people think yes is, I can say yes to everything and I have to do it all. No, you can say yes and point them in the right direction. And that is helping them.
Skot Waldron (22:19.746)
How can people, how's the big why fit into all this? Like can people, does that help people discover that big why for them? Like how do people go through that process you feel like within the community you've been involved with? And I don't know, I'm kinda jumping back to that topic within the context of this, how much like setting boundaries for myself and what do I say yes to? Cause I don't wanna limit my potential and.
No, because I don't want to overwhelm myself because then I can't be healthy for everybody else if I'm unhealthy. You know, and drained and burnt out. So, I don't know the big why question kind of comes back to like, is there, is that hinder people? Is that help people? What do you think?
Courtney Gardner (23:05.537)
I think, um, we break why first you have to be open to it and it has to be clear. Because if that vision is very clear for yourself, it answers all of those questions for you. And then re-centering yourself to that, well, does that fit into this narrative? If I, you know, go down this path, is that going to detract from the ultimate goal of this? Is there another way that I can help someone who's giving an ask?
ask for help to begin with. I mean, there's a contingency of people that are natural, I call them time vampires. That there's natural people out there that will just suck the time out of you. So one being able to recognize those people is you can't really help those people in the way that they want to be served. You can point them in the right direction, but that's about all you can do for it. They're always gonna be seeking somebody else to suck time from. And then narrowing down like the people you really want.
Skot Waldron (23:42.67)
So thank you.
Courtney Gardner (24:02.481)
in your around you, see the top five people in your life define you. Make sure they're in alignment with what you want and how you're driven. And that helps you stay on the path for your big Y once you've narrowed it down, which is hard work. And if you're not crying, it's not your big Y.
It's not it. It's what you're telling yourself is important to you, but it's not actually important to you if you don't feel emotional about it.
Skot Waldron (24:28.77)
Okay.
Courtney Gardner (24:30.569)
Keep drilling.
Skot Waldron (24:32.266)
That's big. Is there, what's the first thing? I believe in application, right? Inspiration's great, but we need application to get the transformation. So where's the application come in? What's one thing somebody can do right now if they're kind of like, I want to do this kind of like, I want to discover this a little bit, this big why thing, or I want to discover kind of more about me and my potential or whatnot.
Courtney Gardner (24:43.913)
Mm-hmm.
Courtney Gardner (24:59.961)
Yeah, I would say visioning, very clear visioning. So sit down, quiet space or music playing if that's how your brain works best. Whatever is your sort of like, ah, moment and really like draw out or write out if you're not artistical. Where do you wanna be in five years? What room are you in? What?
kinds of things are around you, what do your clothes look like, who are the people that are around you? And do that again for 10 years and do it again for 15 years and see where that shifts because they will change as you see yourself in an older period. And it shouldn't always be materialistic things, but it should be like, I wanna be living in a van and traveling the world, whatever your thing is. Have a very clear vision of that, but you have to see yourself in the future.
or you're always living in the present. And if you're living in the present, that's only based on the past, right? Because you don't know anything beyond this day. So you really have to see yourself. And then that will help you drill down to what makes those things happen. And then that helps you drill down to why am I visioning my life that way? Is it sitting at 65 at your Thanksgiving table surrounded by tons of children and grandchildren or spouses or whatever that looks like for you?
If that's what's important to you, then there's something centric about family that's important to you and what about family is important to you. If it's, you know, having 15 dogs in a mansion, then maybe that's about having someone you don't have to take care of as extensively as a child, or maybe you weren't able to have a child and you're trying to fill that space for you and you just want a big old house, then that's something else that's driving you. I don't know. You just gotta vision it though. I'd say that's the first step.
envision what you would like it to look like. And there's no thing that's too big.
Courtney Gardner (27:02.677)
A lot of people think, oh, well, that's not attainable for me. No, everything is possible. What are you willing to sacrifice to get it is whether or not that's achievable.
Skot Waldron (27:12.35)
said by someone who before we hit record said these words, I made this happen. And I think that that's really important to this whole discussion because also earlier you said, you know, I had lots of people, I had cheerleaders, I had people that, you know, maybe they drove you places or they gave you opportunities or that mentored you and those people.
Courtney Gardner (27:20.011)
Yes.
Skot Waldron (27:39.822)
are essential for our growth and they help us get to where we get. But it's ultimately us who make it happen because they're all there around us, but it's up to us to actually, you know, drink the water.
Courtney Gardner (27:54.141)
Yeah. There can be 35 people on the bus, but you're the driver. Right. And I think a lot of people forget that they think if, you know, I, I can't do that because they didn't have a good childhood, I can't do that because I did, I went through a divorce or three or five, I don't know. I can't do that because of this. Like, well, you're the only person at the center of that. So you can make a different choice. You can take another turn. You can.
get out of that bus and pick a different bus, you're the driver. No one else is in charge of that. And it's a, it's a hard truth for yourself. Cause not everybody's ready to hear that. Like personal accountability does not feel good. It does not always feel good. Sometimes it feels great. Usually it does not feel good because it's a hard truth. You're telling yourself and the brain is amazing. It protects you from as much as it's humanly possible to protect you from.
including yourself. So you have to make sure that you're telling yourself what's important truth for your life. And I think that's difficult. That's the hardest part. Let's put that one down. That's the hardest part.
Skot Waldron (29:06.222)
Yeah, I agree. Cause your brain's pretty smart. It knows it is going to protect you from disappointment and fear and struggle and discomfort and, uh, you know, it's, it's programmed to rem to move away from discomfort towards comfort and to also like that effort thing that we have to make. Sometimes our brain's like, Oh, don't make a ton of effort. Cause then you're expending a lot of energy and just do the stuff that's easy. You know? Um,
Courtney Gardner (29:10.389)
So smart.
Courtney Gardner (29:18.741)
Yeah.
Courtney Gardner (29:31.144)
Oh
Yeah. And then you have a society that tells you if you if you're putting in all that effort, you're a try hard and it's like, well, maybe I am but look at me now.
Skot Waldron (29:44.458)
Look at me now, look at me now and look at you now. You made this happen. And that's important. I think to say that and to take pride in your own ability to achieve that I think is really important for people as well. Um, to own it.
Courtney Gardner (29:46.558)
video.
Courtney Gardner (29:50.041)
sometimes.
Courtney Gardner (30:01.321)
Well, and outside of a conversation like this, I don't say that unless someone asks me, like, how'd you get there? I did it. You know, I wouldn't do it that way, but. No, no. I mean, I will say, yeah, I did that. Mm-hmm, it was me. No, I know I wasn't alone, but I know I was the driver of my own bus. I do know that.
Skot Waldron (30:12.151)
You don't do that? Oh, I do that. I mean, I did this.
I did that.
Skot Waldron (30:27.626)
And that's what I'm saying. Like understand your role, understand your responsibility, understand that your life is yours. There are people along the way that are always gonna be there to help you. You don't do it alone, but you are the one.
Courtney Gardner (30:41.225)
Yeah. And, and hurt you. There will always be people out there coming for you and not engaging in that is just as important, right? If everything's always happening to you, the problem is you, right? You're not a victim of everyone. That's not mathematically possible. Everyone in the world can't possibly coming after you. You're either surrounding yourself with the wrong people or you're, you're seeking that attention. Right.
Um, what everybody's got a version of that. We've all dated, you know, the same. Like, why do I keep choosing DJs? That's make any sense to do. They're not the people I want to date. No offense to DJs. Don't at me in the comments. I love the DJ, but you know, if you're constantly dating the same kind of person and like not getting the different outcome that you want, then that's your choice. And, and then it's not happening to you. You need to choose something else.
Skot Waldron (31:41.454)
Yeah, it's happening because of you. And I think that that's really great. Thank you, Courtney. So, and I've noticed that, and I'm gonna say where we've kind of got introduced to the Keller Williams community, and I was at a Keller Williams event a little while ago, and I noticed the energy in that room, the people that were trying to surround themselves. I think that was part of that community that I was in was.
Courtney Gardner (31:44.502)
Yes.
Skot Waldron (32:08.366)
people that wanted to surround themselves with successful people that were aspirational for them, that were somebody somewhere they wanted to be. And that's, you know, that's what some, a lot of mentors, a lot of people out there say it's like, Hey, surround yourself with the people that you want to surround yourself and who you aspire to be. And that will enable you greatly to, to become that. Now you are the driver of your bus. But if you got those people on that bus that are
Courtney Gardner (32:35.07)
Yeah, you are.
Skot Waldron (32:37.542)
actually pointing the direction and supporting you along the way. Telling you how to drive the bus better. All the, all the, you know, that's all the gold right there. All the gold.
Courtney Gardner (32:47.746)
Always good. Whoever's on your zombie apocalypse team, right? They all need to be playing a role for your survival and your growth. Make sure that you have the right people there.
Skot Waldron (32:52.439)
That's it.
Skot Waldron (32:56.822)
That's it. Um, awesome. Where do people, people want to hear more about you? They want to talk to you more. They want to understand a little bit more, um, about what you do and maybe have you come speak on their stage or do something awesome for them. Where do they find you?
Courtney Gardner (33:15.521)
Will you find me on social media? Courtney Gardner on Facebook, The Courtney G on Instagram. You can always email me, atoluxuryrealestate at gmail.com.
Skot Waldron (33:26.114)
There you go. All right, people, I hope you got something out of this. I did. And Courtney, I think you're awesome. I've loved talking to you and all of our conversations are super fun and you're a super fun person. So I hope everybody else had super fun. Uh, listen to the call.
Courtney Gardner (33:34.204)
Likewise.
Courtney Gardner (33:43.102)
I will take that compliment and bounce it back to you.
Skot Waldron (33:46.295)
Thank you. All right. Good times.
Courtney Gardner (33:49.165)
Bye.
